The Power of Respect

Hey guys so, I know it’s been a while, but I was just given this amazing opportunity to be able to give a talk today for this thing called a Read-in. We honored Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. So here is the piece that I decided to read yesterday!


“The time is always right to do what is right.”- Martin Luther King Jr.

So today’s post is gonna be about the one thing that should be instilled in everyone from a young age but isn’t. There are going to be people in your life who genuinely either do not show you respect because of their lack thereof or they simply don’t know how to show you that respect because no one ever taught them.

Respect is a huge thing and quite honestly, it has been a huge thing for a while now. It is something that is so essential to everyday life, and so easy to do.

So why do people lack it?

Disrespect and ignorance kind of go hand in hand with each other. In today’s world, respect isn’t shown as much. They way you parent a child,

Like how do some people expect to be given respect, if it hasn’t even been earned? I mean, think about it, you can’t just walk into a position of authority and demand respect. That’s not how it works. You need to build that trust so that you can respect someone. If you want to be a better person, part of it has to do with being open to all opinions and respecting the opinions that may not be yours. Then again, you don’t have to agree with an opinion you don’t really see fit to your experiences.

Just respect their opinions and understand where they are coming from. You can’t really know what their experiences were, which is why you should always stay open minded and above all, be tolerant of those views.

Everyone has different experiences and come from all walks of life. You are given opportunities to meet these people everyday, regardless of age, race, gender, sexual orientation, and/or disability. R E S P E C T them, that’s all that anyone asks.

I feel like the more we respect, the more we can understand each other and listen to each others views, then we can learn about where other people are coming from based on their frames of reference.

By frames of reference I mean areas of knowledge, like general experiences we have had throughout our lives, that we can provide another insight or perspective on the matter.

We need to be open to those perspectives, respect one another and realize that we are all humans, who are capable of learning respect and tolerance. So begin today.

thank you.


It was such an exhilarating experience to be able to listen to some of the poems that people found surrounding the topic of Martin Luther King Jr., the injustices in today’s society among many more. It’s amazing to see and learn a different perspective.

The Power of Communication

“It’s not what you said, it’s how you said it.”

I’m sure we’ve all heard this at least once in our lives. We, as human beings learn from a very young age how to communicate using various sounds, movements that facilitate a message that lets the other party know what it is we want.

As we get older, we learn that communicating the way that we used to, doesn’t always work and we have to resort to another means of communication: using our words to convey what we want. The amazing thing about communication, though, is the fact that it is never ending. Communication episodes (just a fancy term for conversations), as they’re called, are not just complete with verbal communication, but nonverbal communication, as well.

Sometimes what isn’t said, is shown. For example, you could be having a communication episode with another person who is talking about cars. You’re not too interested in cars, but you try to stay engaged in the conversation. You might ask questions so that it looks like you’re engaged. Making eye-contact is a nonverbal and with that it indicates that they have your undivided attention. But let’s throw in the fact that this person just won’t shut up about the specific parts they used to make their “baby”, your nonverbals begin to show. In other words, you tighten up, you are taking deep breaths. I mean it’s only a matter of time before you practically explode. Then again, through those nonverbals, you are giving off the impression that you are losing interest in the subject matter. So what do you do?

Do you listen to this person drone on, despite already being impatient? or Do you try to change the subject?

When you listen on, your nonverbal communication can gradually increase. Your actions could go from being just impatient to impatient and pissed. So that is a no-go.

Changing the subject would be a better idea because not only are you allowing time for yourself to come up for air, you can talk about things that you and the other person have a common interest in.

Wow. The second answer was so seamless! Yeah. Surprisingly, a lot of conflict can be avoided with proper communication.

Granted, how you say things and how you phrase them, are also part of the battle. So here is a scenario…

Original:  “Matty is being a dick, he says he doesn’t want to be seen with me, yet his actions say otherwise”

How you said it: you don’t like how this guy is treating you, by the looks of it, he could be using you.

How you phrased it: condescending tone; visibly frustrated, tired of a constant pattern that is taking shape.

What can be done to remedy a misunderstanding like this…?


Solution: talk to this Matty person, tell him that he is making you feel like crap and that you don’t want to be playing this game where he doesn’t know what he wants.

Essentially by telling the person how they made you feel, you are then able to make your emotions known to the other person. Simple. But not a lot of people do it. If you think about it, not making your emotions known to someone, reinforces the belief they have that everything is okay. Regardless of what kind of relationship it is. You’re not in high school anymore, so quit assuming and reading too much into what another person is saying to you.

Here’s another scenario:

Original: “Oh my god, Tiffany just texted me this! She says that I ‘can’t hang’, how rude. ugh this calls for a petty response!”

How you said it: You’re surprised at this chick’s response and by the looks of it, you’re not sure what she meant, so your first instinct is to go full-on bitch mode.

How they phrased it: Shaken after reading a text; deciding to go full bitch mode, but also not sure about going that route.

This is another example of another kind of misunderstanding.

Solution: Why don’t you ask, “hey what did you mean when you said *insert their comment here* ?”. Explain how he/she made you feel when they said that and hopefully from there, you two can come to an understanding. Also, don’t resort to text message, if you know that your statement could be taken both ways. Better yet, if you’re not sure if something sounds wrong, then don’t send it. Instead, wait for the next time to talk to the person or if you don’t have the luxury of seeing them, call them up.

Bottom line: Communication is the key to healthy relationships. It is always necessary. Even though verbal communication ends when the conversation ends, nonverbal communication doesn’t. The way that we should navigate misunderstandings and miscommunication is by looking for a common ground so that both parties can be heard and understood.

Sending lots of love and light your way!

The Power of Forgiveness

Hey guys! I hope all of you are enjoying the first few days of the new year! If you’re having trouble finding ways to be motivated in your goals or have no goals for this year, check out my previous post Living Life With Arms Wide Open to see how you can get on the right track this year!

For the next couple of weeks, I am going to be doing a series called, “The Power of…”. My aims are to outline different ways in which you can incorporate certain virtues into your lives and become a better person.

So let’s get started, shall we?

Forgiveness. Where do I even start?

Forgiveness is a powerful thing. It sounds so easy to do, yet it is one of the hardest things a person has to overcome, depending on the severity of the issue. Sometimes, people go years, maybe even a lifetime without forgiving someone who has hurt them. Other times, it takes years and maybe a lifetime to forgive someone. The thing is: forgiveness not only helps you grow, but it helps bring peace within yourself.

I mean imagine having a deep seated hatred for people who have hurt you in the past. You’re mad. You’re furious, over every little thing they do and have done to you. What good are being mad and bottling up that anger?  It is not good for you, at all. You hurt yourself more, in the long run.

That’s why I don’t hate. I let go of all the people who have hurt me. When you let go of the people who have hurt you, you have room for more people in your life. Granted, if a relationship with someone close to you has drifted, due to a fall out, try your best to make amends on your end. If, after trying to make amends on your part, doesn’t work out or the person doesn’t answer you for whatever reason (phone number change, wrong email, etc), then take on the task of forgiving yourself.

As a kid, I used to get bullied. Now I know what you’re thinking, “kids just say the darndest things, they don’t mean it!”, what if I told you their words cut deeper than I could ever imagine? The same way one were to pluck away at the petals of a flower, is the same way bullies were able to pluck away at my weaknesses. I’ve been called everything in the book. It was awful. I did whatever I could: ignore it, tell them off or have my parents get involved with the school. One of the the three actually was proven effective. Thankfully, my last year in middle school, no one messed with me.

My point is, After I graduated from middle school, I was able to forgive the people that hurt me and most of all forgive myself. In the end, I went to a different high school than everyone else that year.

Don’t just forgive, to forgive. Forgive to close a chapter in the book that is your life. You don’t want to harbor any pain you have from that relationship. What will happen is it’ll pour over into all your other relationships and that’s not good either. It doesn’t allow you to heal. To grow.

Remember, the whole point of any change in your life, it starts with you.

If you’re trying to be a better person, start with yourself. Start by applying the power of forgiveness, by taking steps towards forgiving yourself and by forgiving others. If you feel that you should seek out a higher power, then do that. Personally, I seek God and I feel that when I ask for forgiveness, I could do it all in the comfort of my home or at church on my own time. When I have my time with the Lord, I don’t see a priest, but I let myself be free in God’s presence, speak from the heart, and pray at my pew.

It’s all about putting in the work and putting it all into action. The path to greatness doesn’t have to be hard. Just take it step by step and day by day.

Forgiveness is a powerful thing, Meredith. Not only to make the other person feel good, but to heal you. You need to forgive her, Meredith. Forgive her for not being Derek, for being the wrong Shepherd, just enough to remind you of what’s missing, but not enough to bring him back. That’s not her fault. You need to forgive her. You don’t have to like her, you don’t have to love her, but forgive her. So you can forgive Blake, for being in that room when a wrong decision cost you your husband. Forgive Derek for dying too soon. Forgive yourself for hating him for dying too soon. Let it go, Meredith. And forgive.”

Forgiveness. It’s the right thing to do.