The Importance of Goal Setting

With the summer winding down and the excitement for school starting back up again, I thought today’s blog post should be about something surrounding the idea of goals and setting them, lol.

All jokes aside, this has been a post I’ve been meaning to do for a while, but haven’t had the right time, like now to go forth and talk about it.

We are more than halfway through 2018 and by now we have set goals, changed goals or given them up just because… life happens. And that’s totally okay, life has a way of diverting our focus away from our goals.

I don’t know about you, but my goals have been at the center of everything I do, everything I’m working towards. Goals are what keep us motivated. I mean, if you think about it, the concept of goals is so embedded into our lives, that we don’t even realize it.

In fact, the word ‘goals’ is often masked by other words like:

goals

Anytime we get a syllabus, the first part of it is always, “Objectives for this class…” and then the list commences.

But goals aren’t just things made to keep us motivated, they’re also things that help us see the big picture. With each goal or task that we accomplish in our lives, we are essentially paving the way for our future. Our dreams are what keep us moving, they keep us mindful, grounded even.

But the thing about goals, is that they have to be SMART goals. What I mean by that, is your goals have to be Specific Measurable Attainable Reliable and Time-bound.

A lot of times when we make-up our goals, we have a tendency to be super vague in what we want. It’s almost as if we want the end result, yet not wanting to put the work into said goal. I mean there’s always the possibility that we want to accomplish a goal, but we have no idea how to go about completing it or where to even begin.

Recently, I signed up for a 5k. I’ve never done a 5k before, but it’s been on my bucket list for a while.

I was doing an event one morning and there was this lady who was standing in the next table over from me, she was a representative of this foundation called the “Aubrey Foundation”. I asked her what the foundation does and she said that it was made in memory of a school teacher, named Aubrey Pappas, who taught sixth grade English at a North Brunswick school district. In 2014, Aubrey died in a car accident and was also pregnant at the time with her second child.

From the way this person told me the story, Aubrey sounded like such a sweet woman, who motivated her students to become better people and how becoming a better person is a huge key to success. She touched so many lives in her time as a teacher and as a person.

Aubrey’s husband is a cop for the town of North Brunswick and shortly after she died, he found her bucket list and saw that one of the things she wished to accomplish was a 5k. So from that moment on, with the help of family and friends, they vowed to #LiveLikeAubrey and The Aubrey Foundation was born. You can read more about what they do here.

It was really cool hearing that story and it even motivated me to get back on that 5k training grind! The thing about goals is that they can either be short or long term goals.

Short term goals are goals that are short (obviously lol) and easy to achieve in 3 months time. These kinds of goals can be anything, like waking up earlier in the morning, working out 2-3 times a week, going on more walks, etc. Smaller goals keep you accountable, they keep you on your toes and are a lot easier to accomplish, if you work towards them.

Long-term goals are more than short-term goals

and they often involve a life change or a change in mindset. Long-term goals could be: to graduate either magna, summa, or cum laude from college, to work for a well regarded company, to become a doctor, actuary, digital marketer, to live in a specific area, etc. Long term goals are normally things that you are working towards. Funny enough, long term goals need at least a couple of smaller goals to reach the ultimate goal!

An example of goal setting is meditation! Whenever I start a meditation practice, I make a rough list of all the goals I want to accomplish through meditation. Essentially, it’s a compiled list of internal changes I would want to work towards, like becoming more patient, losing weight, becoming more tolerant, etc. Then, out of the list of things I’d want to get out of the practice, I’d pick one that has been of high importance.

The more you focus on that goal, the likely it is for you to accomplish it. Meditation is made to help keep you at ease with the stresses of everyday life as well as making it easier for you to accomplish any aspirations you hold close to your heart.

With all that said, celebrate the small wins. If you’ve done something that gets you even an inch closer to completing your dream, then CELEBRATE!!!

What are some of your goals? Leave me a comment below!

Sending a ton of love and light your way,

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The Mother-Daughter Relationship

Hello my lovely readers! It’s been quite a while since I blogged on here. I had finals left and right and I graduated yesterday, which is just too surreal.

Today’s blogpost is dedicated to all the mothers on this beautiful day. You are loved and you are amazing. You are our first cheerleader and our number one counselor.

But more specifically, this post is going to be about my mom and the many ways in which she is awesome.

My mom is my best friend. She is the most kind and loving mother. Shes been there for everything: my first days at school, boy problems, sticky situations, my teenage years as a whole, move in day, etc. My mom is my rock, she is the one person I can turn to in a time of need.

But it wasn’t always like this (for the most part it has, but let me explain). I remember being in my teenage years and thinking, “what does she know, She’s a MOM.”and every time I thought that, I was always proven wrong. My mom is the wisest person I know. She’s actually been the inspiration for some of my posts (like here and here).

From learning how to cook and learning how to navigate situations, my mom is #1 when it comes to teaching and listening. I can never push anything past her. Seriously. Anytime I feel down, she always asks me “what’s up?” and I go, “nah I’m fine” and she’ll say something like “no seriously what’s up” and it’s like she has a 6th sense, so I eventually tell her what’s up and she’ll tell me, truthfully, if I’m overreacting or if I have a valid reason to feel a certain way, she’ll sit with me and give me advice regardless.IMG_8421

She is literally nominated as the “cool aunt” by my cousins. At first, I never really saw it, because, well I was on the outs with my mom, but I see it now. She reminds me everyday (in some way, shape or form) that a day without laughter is a day wasted.

Even though I get my looks from my dad, I get my creative mindset from her. Shes always pushing me to be a better person and I cannot thank her enough for her constant guidance and lessons. She is my favorite person.

She’s one of those people who sees the good in every person, she saw potential in me, even when I was depressed. She gave me confidence and has impressed on me the importance of things (good and bad) happening for a reason.

For that, she’s my superhero.

Happy Mother’s Day, ma! And to all the amazing women who are doing everything for their children!

As they said at my graduation yesterday, “It is never too late to be a better daughter, a better mother to your children, a better son, a better person”

sending love and light your way,

Fear of The Future

Happy December, everyone! I’ve been so busy this past week, which was why I had LITERALLY no time at all to keep you guys updated on the next big thing! So I apologize, but I’m here now, so let’s talk!

Lately I’ve been doing things that plays roles in planning ahead. I’ve signed up for courses in Spring 2018, continued on my process of applying to colleges, applying for scholarships, among other things.

In the midst of all of this, however, I sense a familiar wave of emotion that kind of washes over me. Fear, if you will, of the future. The same fear that just paralyzed me and played an integral role in my depression the first time around. That same fear of the future, which made me realize that I would be going from a place where I knew where everything was and who my friends were, to a place where I didn’t know any of that and therefore, I would have to learn to do that all over again.

Learning new things and doing something different doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. It could be a positive experience for you. You’ll never know until you make that first step. I used to accept change with such grace, but what part of my anxiety and depression has affected was how I perceived change.

Now, big changes affect me, but that’s normal, right? People are affected in one way or another to big changes, like moving to a new city and going to school. For me, if I want change to happen in my life, I need it to be small and gradual. Of course, in this fast paced world we live in, nothing ever comes small or gradual, it comes at us the size of a train going 150 mph.

But I’ve learned that we cannot be afraid of that change. We must accept it and learn to face this fear, embrace it, and live our lives. The future is in another dimension, it’s something that we prepare for. Why should we be fearful of it? We spend years preparing for a job that we want, we take all the courses necessary to be able to do all things in an appropriate and ethical manner, we prepare ourselves for the degree we want.

As I’ve said before, it is normal to be afraid of the future, because that fear is the same fear that helps us and motivates us. This fear is the one where you actually care about being successful in the future. Paralyzing fear, however, has been known to be detrimental for you. You care too much and you literally cant sleep because, on top of caring too much, you are also thinking about it too much. Instead of working for us, it works against us and we work for it, fueling any insecurities we may have about ourselves. In reality, you don’t have to overthink your future successes, no one is telling you to detail every aspect of your future. Only you are ingraining that into your mind. I mean, think about it, if we were to narrow everything down in our future down to a T, where does that leave the present? Where are you now? What’s even more, is if all of us think too profoundly into the future, imagine how high our stakes are.

Imagine having only one aspiration that leads you to a house, family, etc., what are the odds that it might change? We shouldn’t have to hold one general idea or one general goal and expect that same goal to be the same. For example, for many years, I’ve always wanted to be a doctor or something along the lines of the field of medicine. I would watch all these medical shows and be fascinated at the knowledge of doctors in their fields. But then in my Junior year of high school, I wanted to be a Physical Therapist, I had my plan figured out, I would major in bio then apply for a seat in the Physical Therapy program at the college that I would go to. By the time I got to my senior year of high school, I wanted to become a Physician Assistant(PA), so I toured schools looking for a perfect fit in their Pre-PA majors. I didn’t really find it. So that’s when I resorted to Nursing. When I applied to a school for Nursing, I got my acceptance letter, buuut… I wasn’t exactly in the Nursing program, I was Undeclared-Nursing, which meant that I would be taking a course that was required of all first-year nursing majors and I’d have to work my way up into the Nursing program. I ended up switching my major the second semester of that same year. The reason why I took too long in realizing that working in the medical field just wasn’t for me, was because I was still stuck in that mindset of holding one general idea about myself and my future. When I realized this, I thought to myself, “what would my life be like if I wasn’t a nurse?” “What other job is out there?”.

Fast forward to now, I am happy to see how far I have come and how this experience has led me to where I am. I’m a Communications major with a focus in Marketing and I am looking to get my MBA in Marketing, as well. My dream is to work in Digital Marketing and hopefully contribute to the overall growth of sales and provide ideas for more traffic on certain sites.

The fact of the matter is this: You can plan for your future all you want, you are entitled to how you feel about it, too, but always be open to what life throws at you. Don’t ever feel like you have one set choice. In this life, we have an unlimited amount of choices and it’s up to us to find one that suits our goals. All of this is meant to give you perspective in this life, mapping out your future is a good way to start gaining some perspective, but don’t go overboard. Enjoy your present and be open to your future.

 

 

 

Dear Best Friend

Dear Best friend,

I’ve been thinking about you for quite a bit and it sucks that you live in another state, but I’m always here for you. You are hard-working, smart and brilliant, you amaze me with your ability to remember and recall things you have read. Lately, it seems like you’ve been pretty distant. Based on what has happened in the past, I get it. You have a tough time trusting people and when you do finally open your heart up to someone, especially a guy, you feel like you’re walking on air, because for the first time in your life you feel understood, validated. You shouldn’t feel validated by someone who just gives you the time of day, you should be finding that from inside of yourself.

Believe that you are worth more, that you are blessed beyond measure with a support system, and that you deserve the best. Learn to love yourself first before searching for a man who will give you that same satisfaction. I mean, think about it, how are people going to love someone who does not love themselves first? How can you want a love that everyone else has with their significant others, when you don’t have a loving relationship with yourself? I love you, but I cant make you see the way I love you, if you are not willing to see the beauty in yourself.

Don’t feel hurt by your past. The past is a lesson learned and it doesn’t always have to be a negative thing. The past is what makes us human, it makes us stronger, it molds us into the people we strive to be for tomorrow. The way I see it, that while the past is a mixture of good and bad things, you have a choice. You can choose to be afraid of the future and angry at the past or you can choose to be proactive and push forward, eager to see where the future takes you. You cannot be mad for what has happened. As the saying goes “whatever has happened, happened”, therefore whatever happened in the past, cannot be altered, changed, or deleted. You can’t go back and change it because what has happened, happened for a reason. As I’ve said before, do not look down at your past mistakes, situations, etc, those serve as a purpose to educate you, a chance for you to learn about yourself and the people involved. Past mistakes can be made into positive triumphs, but they cannot be made into positive triumphs if you continue paralyzing yourself over what has already happened. Enough! You’ve done all you could in the situation, if it didn’t work out, it didn’t work out!

You need to surround yourself with people who really see your worth and see you for the amazing person you really are, because you deserve it. You deserve to be free from your hellish demons, that whisper a lie to you every time you don’t perform up to par. Don’t let them win, don’t give them the power to alter your reality. Instead, ground yourself with the utmost truth, that you matter and the world is better a betterplace with you in it.  God made you in His image and likeness. Why would you think of yourself, otherwise? He makes no mistakes. You are my best friend and I want to see you conquer these demons and come out on top, for once.

But you won’t be able to conquer these demons in your head and the stresses of life, unless you become equipped to fight for the life you want to live.

Sending Strength and Love,

Karenn

How to Get On the Right Path In Your Life This Year

Hello there! It’s been a while since I last blogged! I’ve been meaning to write something like this since the New Year started! So without further ado! HA-HA. I present to you, my readers, ways on how YOU can get on the right path and where you want to be, in terms of your life, this year and how you can achieve the goals you’ve had for a while, but have not known where to start. I just want to say that I am beyond excited for the new adventures this year holds and of course what God has in store for all of us (because believe it or not, He grants us awesome adventures, too!) So lets get started!

So if you’re bored most of the time and feel that you have nothing to do, other than instagram, snapchat, facebook, twitter, repeat. Then you should look for a hobby!

Hobbies can be anything you want them to be, you can take knitting classes, crochet classes, painting classes, etc. OR if you are a make-up fiend like me, sign up for some beauty classes at Sephora, they’re completely free to all beauty rewards members!

There are tons of things for you to do and for you to learn!

Try making a dreams poster, if you ever feel lost in your life and you need something that keeps you grounded, this is definitely a craft for you. All you need is poster paper, and at the center of this you put your support system(it can be your friends, family members, anyone who makes you feel good) and to the upper right hand corner, as well as downwards you put any academic goals( so if you want to transfer or graduate from a specific university, put it on there; if you want to get your bachelors and doctorate, then you put that there). If you have any careers you’re dreaming about, but don’t know where to start, put down a couple that interest you in the bottom right hand corner. Then on the bottom left hand corner put all the places you want to travel to at some point in your life. Finally, on the top left hand corner put people you look up to as well as other aspirations, like having a family, living in a big house, etc. etc. Most of all, have fun with this!

If you’re someone like me, who loves to learn new things and immerse themselves in unique experiences, then I recommend that you go to a conference.

About two weeks ago, I went to a Social Justice conference at my school. We talked about a myriad of issues in today’s society, most of which we know about and are always looming over us as young adults. The main purpose of this program was to bring to mind the different issues among many ethnicities and how we can respond to those indifferences in our society. Ethnicities was a major part of what we talked about and we stemmed from that to talk about different issues that bother us in our everyday lives, like the stigma of mental health, sexual orientation, and differences in privilege, mainly how that varies from person to person, based on their race/ethnicities, socioeconomic class, age, among many other things. After that event, I can sincerely and honestly say that I actually learned something and got something out of attending an awesome event! I gained a lot more insight and awareness in terms of diversity. I got to hear many stories, ideas, along with different points of views, that were definitely well-articulated. This conference really helped me open my eyes to not only the issues in our society, but how thankful I am to have experiences like these. Experiences that make you realize ” wow, I am so blessed to be able to go to school with people who recognize the similar issues that we-of a different race-all go through” , or that being surrounded with a group of people who think outside of the box and offer interesting new insights to how we can solve the problems that we as young people, being exposed to this first hand, whether it be working our way through college, dealing with financial aid, scholarships, racism, etc. It’s then that you realize how amazing and valuable each opinion is. I met so many new people that day who think and have similar beliefs as me and really enjoy learning new things in just about anything!

Next goal, if you want to get fit, toned and ready for summer 2k17, then I recommend that you consult with a doctor or a person who knows a great deal about nutrition and exercise and if you’d like to take it a step further, enroll at a gym!

As with anything that takes some time to get used to, getting up early and hauling your ass to a local gym is tough at first, but keep in mind that consistency is key. The more consistent you are with going to the gym, the more it becomes a habit. Just because you worked out in the morning on one day, doesn’t mean you should follow that same schedule. It is completely up to you. If you’re more of a night time work-out person, that is completely okay. If you want to alternate between days, like one day go in the morning, another day go at night, you can do that! That is your choice! I’m more of a wake-up-early-get-gym- over-with-kind of person haha. But given the schedule I have this semester, I’ve gotten flexible with my hours.

Make sure that you are eating healthier, sleeping well, and choosing healthier substitutes to your everyday diet. When you workout, you should not be eating like crap. I mean it’s good to treat yo’self to a good dessert or cheat meal every once in a while, but always remember moderation is key when it comes to eating right. As far as I know, if you want results, make the necessary changes to your diet. Something as small as giving up soda, is just as good as choosing a salad over cookies. Again, I am not a doctor, so therefore I cannot say what you should and shouldn’t eat or what absorbs what at the molecular level. The choice is completely up to you and your fitness goals.

Whatever you decide to do this year, whether its discover a new hobby, working out/ getting to a new lifestyle, or making the decision to go back to school, remember to always have a positive attitude while doing so. I understand that, in this day and age, its like

“how the hell is that possible?!”

Well, it’s actually easier than you think. The key is to notice when you are getting negative thoughts, that contribute to a negative attitude, and try to counteract those with positive thoughts and attitudes.

Just be happy, don’t look for another reason why you shouldn’t be. Be happy with the fact that you are going to become a newer person by the time 2017 ends. You will have learnt new things and actually have different attitudes on things that once either bothered you or dissuaded you. Make this year, the year YOU become happy. If you’re happy when you’re looking for a new hobby, or a new workout plan, GO FOR IT! I am behind you 100% in anything positive and worthwhile you want to immerse yourself in. Just as long as you’re happy doing your own thing, thats all that should really matter. Anything positive that you want to do in your life or anything that you want to change for the better? Do it. Do it with an eager heart and a positive attitude.

Salud y Fuerza!

(Health and Strength)

 

 

 

 

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